Hi everyone, just a breakdown in short of my story, my Wife and I have been married since August of 2008. We love each other completely, we are total sweethearts. Before we got together and married we were in a long distance-relationship from UK to USA… i came over in May, we married in August. We now live with my in-laws. In June of 2008 my father-in-law passed away, at the age of 58. It was an extremely sad time. In September my Wife’s grandmother passed away, so we attended another sad wake.
My Wife and I, although happy together have been fighting a lot ever sine we moved in together. Things have gotten a lot better over time, but at first we were at each other’s necks, i think it was adjusting to being together.
The thing that made me consider leaving is, my Wife has recently gone onto the medication Zoloft, for anti-depressants. Today will be her 4th day on it. She has been spacing out and been a little numb since she’s been on it, which i’m told is normal. But her sex drive has increased with me, which i think not so normal. No complaints though! hehe. Yesterday, we were in the car and she said she had to ask me a question without me being in denial. She asked if i really wanted to be with her. I told her of course, with all of my heart, through the good and the bad times. The argument esculated and she told me that she loves me with all of her heart but doesn’t know if she wants a divorce. She wants to be able to hang out with her ex-boyfriend, her friend. A friend that i took away she says. In the beginning of our relationship/marriage, she wanted to be friends with him, and my Wife is not a cheater, i have no worries there, but i don’t trust this guy at all, so i showed her how uncomfortable i felt about it and occasionaly flipped out if she were to hang out in a group with him when i was in the UK, her twin sister and her bf were best friends with him so she kinda got dragged along, but it’s not like that anymore. She told me that she wants to be able to be friends with him and hang out with him, i asked how often, she said once every 2 weeks. I’m very confused and hurt by this, thinking that my Wife is using her ex-boyfriend as a comfort blanket of some sort. I asked her and she laughed saying it was disgusting of me to say that, she just wants to be friends. I tried compromising and asking if i can come along then,to show that we are together and maybe get to know the kid, you never know i said, i might be comfortable. She said what if i was at work? This makes me so angry, then she insits that if i came along it would be pointless because i’d want to keep a look over her shoulder and that i didn’t trust her. Every time i say i’m uncomfortable she says she feels controlled and that i don’t trust her. I want to set her free, but i don’t want to be hurt. I don’t know if this is what i want anymore, i am 20 and my Wife is 21. Perhaps we rushed into marriage, she said so and said that she just wants to live her life. I said i will not hold her back from anything but can’t deny that her hanging out with a man who is an ex and who she was intimate with makes me feel uncomfortable, that is the only thing she complains about. I really don’t know what to do. I thought i knew her, and she told me today to IGNORE EVERYTHING SHE HAS BEEN SAYING, IT’S THE MEDICATION TALKING AND MAKING HER LOOPY. She said she loves me so much and she’s sorry. But how can i ignore all of this?
She agreed to couples counseling but i’m starting to feel numb thinking about all of the things she said, we are supposed to go into the City today to see the Rangers/Devils game with her friend and his girlfriend but i just feel like staying home and barfing.

Tags: About, Because, Didn't, Feel, Leaving, Thinking, This, Thought, Want, Wife

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